Saturday, January 06, 2007

Second Quarter - Live Blog Continued...

6:30
Tony is hurt. I'll keep you guys posted!

ps - I guess we scored a touchdown or something.

6:26
I was putting on my helmet.

What happened? how are we on the 4?

6:25
Well, I was wrong. Homo blew it by throwing another horrible pass to T.O. Isn't it weird how Owens leads the league in "dropped passes" with Romo at QB?

I told Coach, if he needed me, I'm ready for 4th and 2.

6:18
WARNING! WARNING! THERE ARE TWO MINUTES LEFT IN THE HALF!!!

... not really much of a warning is it?

But when I sign petitions that state the name should be change to "Two Minute Friendly Announcement" the commissioner just laughs it off.

Here's a warning: Don't ignore the best players in the league Mr. Commissioner. You'll soon regret it.

Note: that was a not a threat.

In other news Cowboys are marching down the field... time to play another rousing rendition of HOW WILL HOMO BLOW IT?

My money is always on: Fumble.


6:13
Another Homo 3 and out.

Somewhere Roger Staubach is rolling around in his grave, or, if hes still alive, TOWARDS his grave.

6:10
Homo just got a text message from his mom!

It said "Relax! You're #1!"

I responded and said "Mom, I think I'm gay. TTY after the game. Bye."

lol.

6:03
Another Commenter Question: Anonymous Writes-
Hey Drew,
what would your stats be at this point if Coach had made the correct move and started you?

Hey Anonymous,
It's tough to say... but somewhere in the vicinity of 9/9 205 yards 2 scores with 3 rushes for 14 yards. Also, team morale would be at an all time high.

I just asked one of the waterboys for a Burger and he gave me a gatorade. I poured it on coach and said "this was for the mini victory of getting here."

...he didn't appreciate it.

5:57
I'm trying to think of NBC signs that are anti-Homo that I can pass out to fans who want to be on TV.

So far I have:

Need
Bledsoe!
C'mon!

and:

'Nother
Bad
Completion*

*completion = incompletion by Romo.

Guys got any other good ones?

5:54
Another Homo 3 n' out. What would you expect?

And for those wondering, Yes Andrea Kramer looks like a very very old Melissa Stark, and yes, I would still hit that.

(Just kidding, baby, you know I love you. Daddy's coming home soon.)

106 Comments:

Blogger Hallux Valgus said...

Andrea Kremer looks like Mumm-Ra from the Thundercats. Before regenerating

7:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hey drew, looking good with that beanie on the sidelines...

7:55 PM  
Blogger Krystalina_ said...

Drew,

I was wondering, if you and Chuck Norris both were in a burger eating contest, who would win?

7:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hey drew i say at halftime you rub one out and bust in homo's face

7:56 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hey drew, if romo keeps up this performance, i was wondering, will you be able to blog WHILE playing?

7:56 PM  
Anonymous Raymond Smith said...

Drew, as a true American, what do you think about the John Cougar Mellencamp commercials? They are playing it every 2 minutes. You should be in that commercial because you are a true American and my favorite quarterback. This is our country, this is our quarterback = Drew Bledsoe.

7:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

drew,

if the boys lose tonight, have you been asked to do analysis on TV next week?

7:57 PM  
Blogger Hallux Valgus said...

from John Madden:

"Tony Romo's balls are over the place..."

just thought you'd like to know, Drew

7:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Since Hasselbeck sucks and Parcells is too stupid to use you, is there any chance you could be traded at halftime and win the game for the Seahawks?

7:57 PM  
Blogger Darnell Bond said...

Post some new shit, muthafucka. This shit is getting old.

Sincerely,
Tom Muthafuckin Landry

7:58 PM  
Anonymous chris "i went to the pro bowl once" miller said...

nicknames:

jeremy "breaking my balls" stevens

"celine" deion branch

bill "sub"par-cells

aaron "terry" glenn

terry "terry" glenn

7:58 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Drew, why don't you announce TonyHomo.com publicly, like hold up a banner while your on the sidelines so the TV cameras can read it?

7:58 PM  
Anonymous John said...

Drew, how would Seattle be doing if you were playing QB? Love the beanie, by the way.

7:58 PM  
Blogger Fundamentals Of BioTech101 said...

would you consider going to the raiders to start? What color granaimals does Gramatica wear?

7:58 PM  
Anonymous ndevers said...

Krystalina -

Drew Bledsoe and Chuck Norris in any sort of competition is a joke. Chuck wins, hands down, no offense Drew. Chuck doesn't lose anything, ever. Sorry.

Why not let him size up Bruce Lee instead? Still a tough bastard, just not Chuck Norris, that's all.

ndevers

7:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Drew,

Could you eat a burger as big as John Madden? And if Madden was ground into hamburger, what kind of toppings would go best with him?

7:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Drew,

what would your stats be at this point if Coach had made the correct move and started you?

7:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"A pretty good finger in a dyke"?

Did Al Michaels really say that? Is Pink blowing Michaels and Madden in the booth to keep them awake?

8:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

How about:

Never
Been
Champion

8:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Drew,
Would you ever consider having your two sons playing as a reciever and a running back for the cowsboys and complete the bledsoe trifecta? Just an idea...
Michelle
denton, TX

8:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Negating
Bledsoe
...CRIME

8:00 PM  
Blogger the sharpe said...

Is Al Michaels continually saying finger in a dyke? I can't understand a word that slowly garbles from his mouth.

8:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

NBC = Nothing Beats Chalupas

8:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Next
Bledsoe
Championship

8:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

N-Nothing
B-but
C-Cheeseburgers

8:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Drew!

Approach coach with the "hook and ladder" stunner for a TD!! It worked for Boise State. Hell, you'd be guaranteed playing through the Super Bowl!!

8:02 PM  
Anonymous chris "i went to the pro bowl once" miller said...

you know what would be more interesting than this suckfest of a game? an actual fight between a real cowboy and an angry seagull

8:03 PM  
Blogger Krystalina_ said...

-ndevers

I also too think that Norris would beat him at anything..even at QB'ing..I wonder if they are good friends, or are they enemies, because Chuck Norris might be his only competition on Earth.

8:03 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Drew,

NBC just showed

Neato
Botito
Crummy-QB-ito

8:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wednesday's angioplasty was more fun than this stupid boring game. Can we now please talk about Brokeback Mountain? - Jay Mariotti

8:04 PM  
Anonymous Cameron the beast said...

Homo is...

Not a
Burger
Chomper

8:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No
Bledsoe No
Chance

8:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

NO
BUTTFUCKING
COWBOYS

8:05 PM  
Anonymous Cameron the beast said...

Homo is...

Not a
Burger
Chomper

8:05 PM  
Blogger Matt said...

Need
Bledsoe's
Cannon

8:05 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Drew,

When is your Subway commercial coming on? Obviously you would tell that schmuck Jared that burgers are better than that Subway crap! They don't even have a cheeseburger sub!

8:06 PM  
Anonymous chris "i went to the pro bowl once" miller said...

chuck norris is weak compared to danny bonaduce, aka the inventor of the "apocalyptic curb stomp"...
...but neither hold a candle to the great one, #11.


which reminds me, drew, are you in anyway related to jesus? it would explain a lot.

8:06 PM  
Anonymous James Brown said...

Drew tell the Big Tuna that if he puts you in i will use my magic ghost powers to help you

8:07 PM  
Blogger vinsanity231597 said...

N o more Homo
B ecause he sucks
Cock

8:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Romo is Mexican...
Not
Born in
'Consin

8:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wouldn't John Madden look funny in a teddy bear costume. cmon. Just imagine him announcing a game in one.

8:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Never invite Tony Homo to a
Barbeque where
Children are eating burgers.

it makes sense when you think about it

8:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Drew...was that Boooo or Dreeeeew?

8:08 PM  
Blogger Romo is a Homo said...

Romos Mouth=

Nothin'
But
Cock

8:08 PM  
Blogger Jim said...

Halftimes coming soon - maybe you could get one of these beauties at the break - http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/05124/498674.stm

8:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No
Bledsoe?
Cmon parcells you fucking idiot!

(you have just as many super bowl rings as him)

8:09 PM  
Blogger Matt said...

Drew, I think I've got the best anti-Homo sign I can think of:

No
Brokeback
Cowboys

8:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Drew, if Tony Homo made a burger, what would be on it other than a huge slice of gayness?

8:09 PM  
Anonymous tom_bradoe said...

Drew,

Don't forget to call me tomorrow afternoon so you can coach me up against the Jets.

Homo is gay!

8:09 PM  
Anonymous Ford said...

Hey Bledsoe...

I heard Homo squirmed out of that cod tossing contest at the Seattle Market!

8:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

did anybody else here all say they need to get a finger in the dyke?

8:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nothing
But
inCompletions

8:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Antonio
Licks

My
Icky
Chaffed
Hairy
Ass


...els

8:11 PM  
Anonymous chris "i went to the pro bowl once" miller said...

i had 19,320 yards, 123 TDs, i went to the pro bowl in 91! why am i not in the hall of fame? i have more more passing touchdowns than any running back ever. is that not enough?

8:11 PM  
Blogger thomas said...

A Seahawks fan just threatened to kill Parcells with a comically oversized knife. What do you think about that?

8:11 PM  
Blogger the sharpe said...

Is it true that Bill put away the anointing oil for Homo so that he could use it today before he puts you into the game?

8:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What kind of record would the cowboy had if you had continued starting?

8:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Not
Beating
Cowboys (With Bledsoe instead of Homo that is)

8:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Needing
Bledsoe's
Cowboys

8:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Drew... Why are you the Man?

8:13 PM  
Blogger bum said...

are your live updates getting shorter because you are warming up that gun of yours Drew?

8:14 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Drew, stop ignoring me goddamn it. I'm the King of Chicago Media and can get you that Bears starting job but we gotta' work together buddy. QUICK QUESTION - NBC just showed some guy chopping up a fish (big tuna - get it? I almost didn't...) Anyways, don't you think that would taste like absolute shit if ground up like burger? - Jay Mariotti

8:14 PM  
Anonymous Harry P. Ness said...

Drew,

Do you think the punter, McBriar, should pay Romo a few bucks for making him the best punter in the league?

8:14 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great shot of you on NBC, Drew. I'm pretty sure I heard Madden say you're better than 1,000 Bret Favre's

8:15 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just saw you on screen. Looking good!!! Wondered why you were walking out of screen until Homo came on. Nicely done!!! What were you doing to his helmet?

Loved you ever since New England!

---Gerald.

8:15 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Assuming the Cowboys are loosing by 21 in the 4th quarter (that's conservative, I think), what's the latest you can come in and pull out a victory? The 2 Minute Warning or after that?

8:16 PM  
Anonymous ndevers said...

Krystalina -

Not sure who that Chris Miller bum is, but Chuck Norris is the single greatest threat to the world's safety. even if drew could beat him in a burger eating contest (which he can't), it would more or less mean the end of life as we know because chuck would go on a rampage and kill every living thing in the world with a round house kick. And that's just something that Drew can't stop. nor anyone else.

Also, "fuck danny bonaduce." That's a direct quote from Chuck.

Lastly, I think Madden just said Homo hasn't felt comfortable since leaving the set of Brokeback Mountain.

ndevers

8:16 PM  
Anonymous tom _bradoe said...

Need
Big
Cojones

... of Drew Bledsoe!

8:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh Roger's alive, and he's catholic. (Aka - hates Homos)

8:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Shouldn't you be warming up about now?

8:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Drew,

Who would win in an actual fight between a real cowboy and an angry seagull?

By the way, they just showed you again. You're doing an awesome job of hiding the Blackberry when the camera is on you so you don't get in trouble.

8:17 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

romo and hasselbeck suck!

drew, do you think they'll let you be all-time QB for the second half?

8:17 PM  
Anonymous chris "i went to the pro bowl once" miller said...

who do you think is the best DB on the team?

my vote is homo, as he has always been a giant Douche Bag

8:18 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

When parcells comes to his senses and puts you, do think you'll be playing on defense too? I see you have 5 career tackles and 39 fumble recoveries although the 39 you have recovered were your own fumbles, i think thats irrelevent.

8:19 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Drew, is Gramatica's helmet really that big, or is his head just small.

8:19 PM  
Anonymous ndevers said...

Krystalina-

i change my mind. chuck norris is gay. i love bonaduce...dont tell anyone this but i like to cut the eyes out of ever bonaduce picture i find and hang it on my wall...
...im still not sure why.

8:21 PM  
Blogger Matt said...

Need
Burger
Champion

8:22 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Phil from Austin

Your not live bloging! Someone else is blogging for you...There's no way in hell the coaches will let you play with a blackberry on the sidelines....no way!!

8:22 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You know what would be great. Romo breaking a wrist or something. Then you could go in and shut the seahawks down!

8:24 PM  
Anonymous Danny Bonaduce said...

Why don't you guys stop picking on Tony ROMO? He is not such a bad guy. Always treated me well when we were dating back in the 1980's...

8:25 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Phil, believe me when I tell you this. Even though Bledsoe is really at that game, it IS NOT necessary to ACTUALLY BE AT A GAME for reporting purposes.

Trust me on this Phil, I've built an entire career belittling athletes, teams and coaches without ever showing up to the games.

Luv ya,

Jay Mariotti

8:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

With all these dropped passes, Homo must have anal-lube on the ball.

8:26 PM  
Anonymous chris "i went to the pro bowl once" miller said...

owens hasnt been able to hold on to balls since he parted ways with garcia.

p.s. homo just eye fucked the shit out of witten when he threw that ball

8:27 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Phil from Austin!

He's Drew Effing Bledsoe! He can do anything! If he can eat 20 Burgers during a game without getting caught (and also without getting ketchup on his jersey, I should add) he can totally hide a Blackberry and blog in Stealth Mode.

He's won two AFC championships. TWO. And he's played for three NFL teams. THREE.

I think someone with those stats can blog where ever, when ever.

Don't be a hater.

8:27 PM  
Blogger thomas said...

Danny,
Homo was born in 1980... You're lucky Chris Hansen didn't bust you.

8:28 PM  
Blogger Matt said...

They're holding other men, obviously more of the Antonio Homo influence.

8:28 PM  
Anonymous chuck norris said...

EVERYONE LISTEN!

I, CHUCK NORRIS, AM...

hold on....Yes! Touchdown Crayton!

anyway, where was i?...oh yeah:

GAY.

8:29 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Romo's limping! Drew, grab your helmet!

8:29 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Homo is hurt! Get ready Drew!

8:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Drew, how many times--on average--do you put on and take off your helmet during a game?

8:30 PM  
Anonymous chris "i went to the pro bowl once" miller said...

HALFTIME.

lets go get some burgers.

8:31 PM  
Anonymous The Masked Ranger said...

Homo didn't JUST get hurt. He is just a little sore form ass-ramming with T.O and Parcells.

8:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Michaels said the TD pass was to the Cowboys 3rd receiver. What, Homo can't find the good guys? Is he scared of them because in his heart he knows he's a backup?

8:33 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Homo down.
We've got a Homo down...

8:34 PM  
Anonymous chris "i went to the pro bowl once" miller said...

well, i have to go. Ive got too much partying with coeds at my alma mater Oregon to do.

love,

chris miller. vote me in bitches!

8:34 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Drew, maybe you can start a new franchise, and bring together only the players you want to play with. So many peeps would pay good money to see you playing again. Get out there.

8:35 PM  
Blogger Krystalina_ said...

Chuck Norris...is an impersonator!
The real Chuck Norris doesn't even use a computer..he gets Danny Bonaduce to do it for him.

8:35 PM  
Anonymous ray said...

hey drew,

do you think u can hurt tony? i have 50 on the seahawks and i think the proper message to send to coach is to show him that the cowboys lose with romo.

thanks,
ray

8:36 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just saw the commercial for a new show, where contestants try out for the musical " Grease". They look pretty gay to me. Wonder if Tony Homo will be on the show. After all Emmett went dancing with the stars.

8:36 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

God, please let us win. Put TO out of the game. Throw that piece of crap out. Get him off the field. We don't need him. We've got Terry and Jason. Get off the field a hole.

8:37 PM  
Anonymous chris "i went to the pro bowl once" miller said...

I sure hope Homo isn't hurt, it'd be a shame to see the 'Boys lose with Bledsoe out there.

8:37 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

start a new franchise...

Great idea! Call the team Bledsoe Burgers and be sure to sign Bernie Kosar as the backup. That way no matter what Drew will be the most mobile quarterback option.

8:38 PM  
Anonymous Big Dane said...

Drew -

I'm not a doctor or anything, but if Homo is limping its probably worth it to amputate his leg before whatever is ailing him gets a chance to spread to the rest of his body. Maybe you could help him?

8:39 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Damnit Bledsoe, tell us when you are changing the friggin' thread...

8:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Greg Kiley
Saratoga Spings NY
Bacon burger

8:42 PM  
Blogger mike said...

What better way to send your love across the miles than a Valentines Day Care Package? This delightful red gift box includes a delightful teddy bears, Hershey Kisses and an assortment of valentines chocolates.

4:58 AM  

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