Saturday, December 16, 2006

I am not a Snitch

Hey all. Greetings from Atlanta.

Firstly, I wanted to say thank you to everybody in Atlanta, the fans here have been so nice to me. They keep yelling stuff like "I wish you were starting tonight!" "Hey, Coach! Start Drew! Don't let Homo play tonight! Please!"

It's great that fans just want to see the greatest talent on the field, even if it means their team losing the most important game of the season.

One exceptionally generous fan said he'd pay $1,000 of his own money just to see me play against his beloved Falcons. You gotta admire that. How many Knicks fans in the 90's would pay that much just to see Jordan beat their favorite team?

As for my prediction: The Falcons are playing at home in a must-win environment so I'm going to say Falcons 55 - Cowboys 9.

Fortunately for all you Dallas natives, odds are none of you have the NFL Network so you won't even be allowed to watch this bloodbath.

Fun fact: After Homo loses tonight, he will be a mediocre 5-4 as a closer, and I will be 3-2.
(I don't count games you start, I count games you end, so that Giants loss in week 7 is on him.)

ps - The flight to Atlanta was short, but not short enough to prevent a great practical joke on Homo. I had unloaded about 40 packets of Sugar in the Raw into my pocket, waiting for Homo to order his drink so that I could "Sweetin' the Deal" The joke would work in two phases: 1) he would think his drink was extra sweet and thus poisoned and 2) he would get cavities.

Unfortunately, Romo never ordered a drink, so while we were getting off the plane I just poured the suger all over his shoes. Sucka!

pps - I know you guys are probably wondering, and the Burgers here in Atlanta are only "Pretty Good." I printed out the top fifty Burger places before I left (as I do in every city I go to) and so far I've only attended 43 of them, and their average rating is a meager 763/1,000.

11 Comments:

Blogger chris said...

u r a moron and romo is better and well u should just go leave the nfl and no u don't deserve to be in the hall of fame u have had a horrible career just a long one that has allowed u to get up to all those stats u moron go fucking die.

4:10 PM  
Blogger strobman said...

shut up chris

6:42 PM  
Blogger Tortfeasor said...

Hey, Chris and Strobman, both of you die in a fire.

6:57 PM  
Blogger Mimi said...

Chris, puncuation is your friend. Give him a call sometime.
Mr. Bledsoe, I neither know nor care about your football career. However, this blog is quite possibly the most entertaining thing I've read in a long time.
Now Chris I hope you've read this and taken note of that silly little thing called grammar. Now that you've been enlightened, go forth and do good things.

9:00 PM  
Blogger Nick said...

Drew,

Don't mind Chris. He's probably just Homo, drunk, and possibly stoned, after the game. He pretty much sucked tonight. If it wasn't for Owens, he would have been 22/29, 278 yards, and an interception. That's pretty pathetic compared to your standards. I believe you could have been 45/47, 675 yards, and about 7 touchdowns, if Coach Parcells had played you.

I'm seriously wondering if there's something wrong with Coach's head. He can't see through whatever smokescreen is in there. Homo is sucking every week. Anyone could hand off to the talented runningbacks that you groomed.

I really think he should start you next week, if the Cowboys have any playoff hopes at all. If they do make the playoffs with Homo, it would be because of your wins that you got early in the season.

If you don't start the playoff game, I'm predicting a blowout. Then, Homo will be run out of town, and you'll be the starter in 2007, and totally pwn.

That's all man, you rock.

12:18 AM  
Blogger Rob said...

Drew -

If you end up starting for another NFL team, I'll goto McDonald's and order a salad (and I, like you, do love my burgers, Drew).

Let's review, shall we:

1. You are as mobile as a redwood tree....but decidedly less sturdy.

2. You're decision-making ability relative to NFL quaterbacking is akin to that of a chihuahua.

3. You great with a visor and a clipboard. Seriously.

I've never seen someone throw so adeptly to the opposing team in crunch-time situations. I will miss that patented "fading away off the back foot throwing across my body into triple coverage in the flat by the goal-line" throw. I will call that "Pulling a Bledsuck" from now on, or perhaps I will just shorten it to "Bledsuck". I haven't seen anything get picked that fast since someone put a triple hamburger with pickles in front of you.

P.S. Tony Romo, HOF 2021

11:04 AM  
Blogger sertman said...

I'm going to apologize for Homo, Drew. He seems to keep on registering different blogs to berate you. He just can't take the heat, Drew. I mean, he's registering as chris, amber, and now rob? You can just tell he doesn't eat burgers.

5:11 PM  
Blogger chris said...

fuck u guys the only reason i hate bledsoe is cuase he ruined buffalo by sucking mike mualrkey left but.

10:26 AM  
Blogger Head Chick said...

I saw you at the game on Saturday and you looked cute in your visor. Romo tries to do that backwards cap thing, but you look better in the visor.

Did you feel affirmed when you got to do the coin toss by yourself as the only Boys captain?

Were you sad that none of the 1.5 million Boys fans at the Dome were wearing your jersey?

3:22 PM  
Blogger steven said...

Hey drew, I as wondering if you were free to tutor my son in how to be a benchwarmer/clipboard holder? I mean, now that you have the time and all.

1:02 AM  
Blogger Rick said...

Chris...

The fucking blog is a joke, have a sense of humor.

5:18 AM  

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