Ho Ho Homo! Merry Christmas!

Christmas and football.

There are other sports/holiday pairings, (Memorial Day/Basketball, Labor Day/Baseball, Boxing Day/Boxing) but nothing goes together quite like Christmas and football.

I think Jesus would have made a great tight end.

Luckily, the Cowboys are at home Christmas day against the Eagles, so my family and I got to spend all day putting up Christmas decorations around the house. It was hard locating a stocking big enough to fit a "Romo Christmas Day Loss" but I think I finally found one!

As you guys know, I'm usually pretty optimistic about the Cowboy's chances to win football games. However, it's going to be pretty sweet watching Romo playing Grinch this Monday and ruining thousands of peoples' Christmas. If only I could trick him into wearing my personalized "Santa isn't Real" Cowboys #9 Jersey...

I am a little dissappointed though. I was hoping that Donovan would make the trip to Dallas, and we could discuss our... similar situations. I'm sure if there is anybody who knows what I'm going through its Donovan McNabb.

We were two football gods.... replaced by mortals. Yes, we have both taken a back seat to some overhyped "back-up."

I know what you're thinking, "But, McNabb was replaced by Garcia because he was injured. He tore his ACL. You are completely healthy. It's not really the same at all."

Weak argument.

First of all, I am injured. I have back spasms. And... I have... Plantar Fasciitis. Kay?

Secondly, you think for a second that Donovan McNabb, torn ACL and all, couldn't be out there competing at a level higher than Garcia? By the same token, don't you think I could overcome my spasms and that other thing I have, to play better than Homo? Well we can. And it kills us to watch these crackers take our starting spots! Donovan is a brother of mine from another mother...of mine. Two mothers, one brother. Does that make sense?

Yes, he's only been to one SuperBowl and I've been to two. And yes, he has less completions and touchdowns in his career than I do, but that doesn't mean that he's not a good quarterback!

Donovan is a family man, just like myself, and for us to lose our starting jobs to these... well... let's just say T.O. told me a lot about Jeff Garcia that I can't repeat right now because this is a family blog. Also, because I'm not really sure how to spell "Tea-bagging." Is there a hyphen in there, or not?

Either way, I was just saying that I'm sad because before this season, I'm sure the fans were looking forward to two future hall of famers going at it Christmas day, and instead they have to watch a couple of girls play catch with the opposing defense.

I understand that the audience feels like little kids again. They expected to wake up early Christmas morning, run downstairs and see boxes big enough to fit bycicles under the tree. Instead they run downstairs and notice their uncle, drunk in a Santa costume, passed out with a massive headwound near where the tree should have been, but now is not. I'm sorry kids, there will be no Christmas this year.

Happy Holidays!