Leave the Poor Kid Alone!
I'm hearing plenty of rumors every day about the Jessica Simpson/Tony Romo affair. And let me be the first to say, that these reports are untrue.
Actually, to be more precise, these reports are COMPLETELY untrue, and beyond the realm of possible. Absolutely 100% inplausable. I mean, one quick glance at the kid and you know that the allegations are udderly false. In fact, they are borderline insulting.
This reminds me of the time my down-syndrome cousin was feeling depressed, so my aunt and uncle kept asking him "Hey! Didn't I see you at the movies with Pam Anderson!?" except it didn't cheer him up. He felt their pity, and that guilt made him feel ugly. Uglier than he ever felt before.
Anyway, what I'm trying to say is, any retard can throw for 300 yards against the Cardinals' secondary. Just leave the poor kid alone!
ps - The Colts are favored by 1.5 points against us this week. So if anybody knows a bookie that will let me put up my entire Patriots contract on Indy (10 years, $103 million, no big deal) let me know. I've got four children I need to feed, and these Burgers don't buy themselves.
Actually, to be more precise, these reports are COMPLETELY untrue, and beyond the realm of possible. Absolutely 100% inplausable. I mean, one quick glance at the kid and you know that the allegations are udderly false. In fact, they are borderline insulting.
This reminds me of the time my down-syndrome cousin was feeling depressed, so my aunt and uncle kept asking him "Hey! Didn't I see you at the movies with Pam Anderson!?" except it didn't cheer him up. He felt their pity, and that guilt made him feel ugly. Uglier than he ever felt before.
Anyway, what I'm trying to say is, any retard can throw for 300 yards against the Cardinals' secondary. Just leave the poor kid alone!
ps - The Colts are favored by 1.5 points against us this week. So if anybody knows a bookie that will let me put up my entire Patriots contract on Indy (10 years, $103 million, no big deal) let me know. I've got four children I need to feed, and these Burgers don't buy themselves.
posted by Really Drew Bledsoe | 9:39 PM
7 Comments:
I would make that bet too ... no way the Boys are within 10
I hate to disagree with your sage wisdom, drew, but I'm taking the cowboys to win this week, 31-24. However, we know Tony will stink it up against Indy, so i predict 3 interceptions for Homo and only one TD. Then two TD's from the defense first from a double tipped interception and three laterals, and the second from an actual fumble on a failed fumblerooski. The final TD will be from special teams on a double fake bloody pants reverse punt. Then Mike "i'm the greatest" Vanderjagt will miss a FG from 25 yards and make one from 48.
I think this will finally be enough for the big fat Tuna to bench RomEo(ROCK ME!)
Drew, did you forget about me man? You write an open letter to Byron but not me?
How bout free burgers on me?
You know drew, sometimes I forget you were a former #1 overall pick just like me. That is also another thing your better at than homo.
Drew,
Postpone Thanksgiving, dude.
I smell your starting spot coming back.
And a burger.
Drew:
Thanks for putting to bed the Simpson rumors. Another question, I saw that TO published a childrens book. Does Tony have any plans to follow in TO's footsteps and write a childrens book? I hope so. I would love to see what advice he would have for children.
just the thought of the words "udderly false" in a story in any way related to Jessica Simpson gives me a total chubber.
Oh yeah, sloppy cheeseburgers give me wood too.
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