6:30
Tony is hurt. I'll keep you guys posted!
ps - I guess we scored a touchdown or something.
6:26
I was putting on my helmet.
What happened? how are we on the 4?
6:25
Well, I was wrong. Homo blew it by throwing another horrible pass to T.O. Isn't it weird how Owens leads the league in "dropped passes" with Romo at QB?
I told Coach, if he needed me, I'm ready for 4th and 2.
6:18
WARNING! WARNING! THERE ARE TWO MINUTES LEFT IN THE HALF!!!
... not really much of a warning is it?
But when I sign petitions that state the name should be change to "Two Minute Friendly Announcement" the commissioner just laughs it off.
Here's a warning: Don't ignore the best players in the league Mr. Commissioner. You'll soon regret it.
Note: that was a not a threat.
In other news Cowboys are marching down the field... time to play another rousing rendition of HOW WILL HOMO BLOW IT?
My money is always on: Fumble.
6:13
Another Homo 3 and out.
Somewhere Roger Staubach is rolling around in his grave, or, if hes still alive, TOWARDS his grave.
6:10
Homo just got a text message from his mom!
It said "Relax! You're #1!"
I responded and said "Mom, I think I'm gay. TTY after the game. Bye."
lol.
6:03
Another Commenter Question: Anonymous Writes-
Hey Drew,
what would your stats be at this point if Coach had made the correct move and started you?
Hey Anonymous,
It's tough to say... but somewhere in the vicinity of 9/9 205 yards 2 scores with 3 rushes for 14 yards. Also, team morale would be at an all time high.
I just asked one of the waterboys for a Burger and he gave me a gatorade. I poured it on coach and said "this was for the mini victory of getting here."
...he didn't appreciate it.
5:57
I'm trying to think of NBC signs that are anti-Homo that I can pass out to fans who want to be on TV.
So far I have:
Need
Bledsoe!
C'mon!
and:
'Nother
Bad
Completion*
*completion = incompletion by Romo.
Guys got any other good ones?
5:54
Another Homo 3 n' out. What would you expect?
And for those wondering, Yes Andrea Kramer looks like a very very old Melissa Stark, and yes, I would still hit that.
(Just kidding, baby, you know I love you. Daddy's coming home soon.)
Andrea Kremer looks like Mumm-Ra from the Thundercats. Before regenerating
ReplyDeletehey drew, looking good with that beanie on the sidelines...
ReplyDeleteDrew,
ReplyDeleteI was wondering, if you and Chuck Norris both were in a burger eating contest, who would win?
hey drew i say at halftime you rub one out and bust in homo's face
ReplyDeletehey drew, if romo keeps up this performance, i was wondering, will you be able to blog WHILE playing?
ReplyDeleteDrew, as a true American, what do you think about the John Cougar Mellencamp commercials? They are playing it every 2 minutes. You should be in that commercial because you are a true American and my favorite quarterback. This is our country, this is our quarterback = Drew Bledsoe.
ReplyDeletedrew,
ReplyDeleteif the boys lose tonight, have you been asked to do analysis on TV next week?
from John Madden:
ReplyDelete"Tony Romo's balls are over the place..."
just thought you'd like to know, Drew
Since Hasselbeck sucks and Parcells is too stupid to use you, is there any chance you could be traded at halftime and win the game for the Seahawks?
ReplyDeletePost some new shit, muthafucka. This shit is getting old.
ReplyDeleteSincerely,
Tom Muthafuckin Landry
nicknames:
ReplyDeletejeremy "breaking my balls" stevens
"celine" deion branch
bill "sub"par-cells
aaron "terry" glenn
terry "terry" glenn
Drew, why don't you announce TonyHomo.com publicly, like hold up a banner while your on the sidelines so the TV cameras can read it?
ReplyDeleteDrew, how would Seattle be doing if you were playing QB? Love the beanie, by the way.
ReplyDeletewould you consider going to the raiders to start? What color granaimals does Gramatica wear?
ReplyDeleteKrystalina -
ReplyDeleteDrew Bledsoe and Chuck Norris in any sort of competition is a joke. Chuck wins, hands down, no offense Drew. Chuck doesn't lose anything, ever. Sorry.
Why not let him size up Bruce Lee instead? Still a tough bastard, just not Chuck Norris, that's all.
ndevers
Drew,
ReplyDeleteCould you eat a burger as big as John Madden? And if Madden was ground into hamburger, what kind of toppings would go best with him?
Hey Drew,
ReplyDeletewhat would your stats be at this point if Coach had made the correct move and started you?
"A pretty good finger in a dyke"?
ReplyDeleteDid Al Michaels really say that? Is Pink blowing Michaels and Madden in the booth to keep them awake?
How about:
ReplyDeleteNever
Been
Champion
Dear Drew,
ReplyDeleteWould you ever consider having your two sons playing as a reciever and a running back for the cowsboys and complete the bledsoe trifecta? Just an idea...
Michelle
denton, TX
Negating
ReplyDeleteBledsoe
...CRIME
Is Al Michaels continually saying finger in a dyke? I can't understand a word that slowly garbles from his mouth.
ReplyDeleteNBC = Nothing Beats Chalupas
ReplyDeleteNext
ReplyDeleteBledsoe
Championship
N-Nothing
ReplyDeleteB-but
C-Cheeseburgers
Hey Drew!
ReplyDeleteApproach coach with the "hook and ladder" stunner for a TD!! It worked for Boise State. Hell, you'd be guaranteed playing through the Super Bowl!!
you know what would be more interesting than this suckfest of a game? an actual fight between a real cowboy and an angry seagull
ReplyDelete-ndevers
ReplyDeleteI also too think that Norris would beat him at anything..even at QB'ing..I wonder if they are good friends, or are they enemies, because Chuck Norris might be his only competition on Earth.
Hey Drew,
ReplyDeleteNBC just showed
Neato
Botito
Crummy-QB-ito
Wednesday's angioplasty was more fun than this stupid boring game. Can we now please talk about Brokeback Mountain? - Jay Mariotti
ReplyDeleteHomo is...
ReplyDeleteNot a
Burger
Chomper
No
ReplyDeleteBledsoe No
Chance
NO
ReplyDeleteBUTTFUCKING
COWBOYS
Homo is...
ReplyDeleteNot a
Burger
Chomper
Hey Drew,
ReplyDeleteWhen is your Subway commercial coming on? Obviously you would tell that schmuck Jared that burgers are better than that Subway crap! They don't even have a cheeseburger sub!
chuck norris is weak compared to danny bonaduce, aka the inventor of the "apocalyptic curb stomp"...
ReplyDelete...but neither hold a candle to the great one, #11.
which reminds me, drew, are you in anyway related to jesus? it would explain a lot.
Drew tell the Big Tuna that if he puts you in i will use my magic ghost powers to help you
ReplyDeleteN o more Homo
ReplyDeleteB ecause he sucks
Cock
Romo is Mexican...
ReplyDeleteNot
Born in
'Consin
Wouldn't John Madden look funny in a teddy bear costume. cmon. Just imagine him announcing a game in one.
ReplyDeleteNever invite Tony Homo to a
ReplyDeleteBarbeque where
Children are eating burgers.
it makes sense when you think about it
Hey Drew...was that Boooo or Dreeeeew?
ReplyDeleteRomos Mouth=
ReplyDeleteNothin'
But
Cock
Halftimes coming soon - maybe you could get one of these beauties at the break - http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/05124/498674.stm
ReplyDeleteNo
ReplyDeleteBledsoe?
Cmon parcells you fucking idiot!
(you have just as many super bowl rings as him)
Drew, if Tony Homo made a burger, what would be on it other than a huge slice of gayness?
ReplyDeleteDrew,
ReplyDeleteDon't forget to call me tomorrow afternoon so you can coach me up against the Jets.
Homo is gay!
Hey Bledsoe...
ReplyDeleteI heard Homo squirmed out of that cod tossing contest at the Seattle Market!
did anybody else here all say they need to get a finger in the dyke?
ReplyDeleteNothing
ReplyDeleteBut
inCompletions
Antonio
ReplyDeleteLicks
My
Icky
Chaffed
Hairy
Ass
...els
i had 19,320 yards, 123 TDs, i went to the pro bowl in 91! why am i not in the hall of fame? i have more more passing touchdowns than any running back ever. is that not enough?
ReplyDeleteA Seahawks fan just threatened to kill Parcells with a comically oversized knife. What do you think about that?
ReplyDeleteIs it true that Bill put away the anointing oil for Homo so that he could use it today before he puts you into the game?
ReplyDeleteWhat kind of record would the cowboy had if you had continued starting?
ReplyDeleteNot
ReplyDeleteBeating
Cowboys (With Bledsoe instead of Homo that is)
Needing
ReplyDeleteBledsoe's
Cowboys
Drew... Why are you the Man?
ReplyDeleteare your live updates getting shorter because you are warming up that gun of yours Drew?
ReplyDeleteHey Drew, stop ignoring me goddamn it. I'm the King of Chicago Media and can get you that Bears starting job but we gotta' work together buddy. QUICK QUESTION - NBC just showed some guy chopping up a fish (big tuna - get it? I almost didn't...) Anyways, don't you think that would taste like absolute shit if ground up like burger? - Jay Mariotti
ReplyDeleteDrew,
ReplyDeleteDo you think the punter, McBriar, should pay Romo a few bucks for making him the best punter in the league?
Great shot of you on NBC, Drew. I'm pretty sure I heard Madden say you're better than 1,000 Bret Favre's
ReplyDeleteJust saw you on screen. Looking good!!! Wondered why you were walking out of screen until Homo came on. Nicely done!!! What were you doing to his helmet?
ReplyDeleteLoved you ever since New England!
---Gerald.
Assuming the Cowboys are loosing by 21 in the 4th quarter (that's conservative, I think), what's the latest you can come in and pull out a victory? The 2 Minute Warning or after that?
ReplyDeleteKrystalina -
ReplyDeleteNot sure who that Chris Miller bum is, but Chuck Norris is the single greatest threat to the world's safety. even if drew could beat him in a burger eating contest (which he can't), it would more or less mean the end of life as we know because chuck would go on a rampage and kill every living thing in the world with a round house kick. And that's just something that Drew can't stop. nor anyone else.
Also, "fuck danny bonaduce." That's a direct quote from Chuck.
Lastly, I think Madden just said Homo hasn't felt comfortable since leaving the set of Brokeback Mountain.
ndevers
Need
ReplyDeleteBig
Cojones
... of Drew Bledsoe!
Oh Roger's alive, and he's catholic. (Aka - hates Homos)
ReplyDeleteShouldn't you be warming up about now?
ReplyDeleteDrew,
ReplyDeleteWho would win in an actual fight between a real cowboy and an angry seagull?
By the way, they just showed you again. You're doing an awesome job of hiding the Blackberry when the camera is on you so you don't get in trouble.
romo and hasselbeck suck!
ReplyDeletedrew, do you think they'll let you be all-time QB for the second half?
who do you think is the best DB on the team?
ReplyDeletemy vote is homo, as he has always been a giant Douche Bag
When parcells comes to his senses and puts you, do think you'll be playing on defense too? I see you have 5 career tackles and 39 fumble recoveries although the 39 you have recovered were your own fumbles, i think thats irrelevent.
ReplyDeleteHey Drew, is Gramatica's helmet really that big, or is his head just small.
ReplyDeleteKrystalina-
ReplyDeletei change my mind. chuck norris is gay. i love bonaduce...dont tell anyone this but i like to cut the eyes out of ever bonaduce picture i find and hang it on my wall...
...im still not sure why.
Phil from Austin
ReplyDeleteYour not live bloging! Someone else is blogging for you...There's no way in hell the coaches will let you play with a blackberry on the sidelines....no way!!
You know what would be great. Romo breaking a wrist or something. Then you could go in and shut the seahawks down!
ReplyDeleteWhy don't you guys stop picking on Tony ROMO? He is not such a bad guy. Always treated me well when we were dating back in the 1980's...
ReplyDeletePhil, believe me when I tell you this. Even though Bledsoe is really at that game, it IS NOT necessary to ACTUALLY BE AT A GAME for reporting purposes.
ReplyDeleteTrust me on this Phil, I've built an entire career belittling athletes, teams and coaches without ever showing up to the games.
Luv ya,
Jay Mariotti
With all these dropped passes, Homo must have anal-lube on the ball.
ReplyDeleteowens hasnt been able to hold on to balls since he parted ways with garcia.
ReplyDeletep.s. homo just eye fucked the shit out of witten when he threw that ball
Hey Phil from Austin!
ReplyDeleteHe's Drew Effing Bledsoe! He can do anything! If he can eat 20 Burgers during a game without getting caught (and also without getting ketchup on his jersey, I should add) he can totally hide a Blackberry and blog in Stealth Mode.
He's won two AFC championships. TWO. And he's played for three NFL teams. THREE.
I think someone with those stats can blog where ever, when ever.
Don't be a hater.
Danny,
ReplyDeleteHomo was born in 1980... You're lucky Chris Hansen didn't bust you.
EVERYONE LISTEN!
ReplyDeleteI, CHUCK NORRIS, AM...
hold on....Yes! Touchdown Crayton!
anyway, where was i?...oh yeah:
GAY.
Romo's limping! Drew, grab your helmet!
ReplyDeleteHomo is hurt! Get ready Drew!
ReplyDeleteDrew, how many times--on average--do you put on and take off your helmet during a game?
ReplyDeleteHALFTIME.
ReplyDeletelets go get some burgers.
Homo didn't JUST get hurt. He is just a little sore form ass-ramming with T.O and Parcells.
ReplyDeleteMichaels said the TD pass was to the Cowboys 3rd receiver. What, Homo can't find the good guys? Is he scared of them because in his heart he knows he's a backup?
ReplyDeleteHomo down.
ReplyDeleteWe've got a Homo down...
well, i have to go. Ive got too much partying with coeds at my alma mater Oregon to do.
ReplyDeletelove,
chris miller. vote me in bitches!
Drew, maybe you can start a new franchise, and bring together only the players you want to play with. So many peeps would pay good money to see you playing again. Get out there.
ReplyDeleteChuck Norris...is an impersonator!
ReplyDeleteThe real Chuck Norris doesn't even use a computer..he gets Danny Bonaduce to do it for him.
hey drew,
ReplyDeletedo you think u can hurt tony? i have 50 on the seahawks and i think the proper message to send to coach is to show him that the cowboys lose with romo.
thanks,
ray
I just saw the commercial for a new show, where contestants try out for the musical " Grease". They look pretty gay to me. Wonder if Tony Homo will be on the show. After all Emmett went dancing with the stars.
ReplyDeleteGod, please let us win. Put TO out of the game. Throw that piece of crap out. Get him off the field. We don't need him. We've got Terry and Jason. Get off the field a hole.
ReplyDeleteI sure hope Homo isn't hurt, it'd be a shame to see the 'Boys lose with Bledsoe out there.
ReplyDeletestart a new franchise...
ReplyDeleteGreat idea! Call the team Bledsoe Burgers and be sure to sign Bernie Kosar as the backup. That way no matter what Drew will be the most mobile quarterback option.
Drew -
ReplyDeleteI'm not a doctor or anything, but if Homo is limping its probably worth it to amputate his leg before whatever is ailing him gets a chance to spread to the rest of his body. Maybe you could help him?
Damnit Bledsoe, tell us when you are changing the friggin' thread...
ReplyDeleteGreg Kiley
ReplyDeleteSaratoga Spings NY
Bacon burger